On a warm evening in May, Nancy Joseph-Gould hosted a party at a park in Lowry to celebrate the high school graduation of two sisters who had come to the United States 18 months ago as refugees from Afghanistan. Blue and silver Class of 2023 balloons adorned the pavilion and large trays of grilled meat, rice and other Afghan dishes filled a picnic table. Wearing a black head scarf and a colorful, intricately embroidered shirt from her homeland, Nilab Walizada, 19, sat at a table next to her sister Maryam, 18, who wore a canary yellow dress with embroidered white flowers and a matching yellow head scarf. Their parents and siblings sat at a nearby table, greeting guests and eating.

Nancy called the sisters over to another table to cut a cake she had ordered for them. The chocolate cake with white icing was decorated with the flag of Afghanistan, a photo of the girls during a visit to MSU Denver, where they will attend college, and the words “Tobrik Basha” (Congratulations in Dari, their native language).

Maryam and Nilab gasped and hugged Nancy, the 73-year-old volunteer who has been to their home countless times since they moved to Denver. Nilab exclaimed:

“The flag, the picture and the words – I love it! Thank you so much!”

The cake was another example of what the sisters appreciate about Nancy – her care and thoughtfulness in honoring their background while helping them access opportunities for a brighter future. Maryam and Nilab credit Nancy for guiding them through nearly every challenge they’ve faced since coming to Denver – taking them to register for school, advocating for them in school, helping them through personal struggles, explaining the American education system, helping them apply to colleges and for scholarships and just being there as a friend.

“She is an amazing person. Everything about her is special. She has helped us through everything,”

Nilab said.

“When I am stressed, I call Nancy and she makes me feel better.”

Maryam summed it up this way:

“When you tell her about your problem, she will solve it.”

Nancy has worked to solve problems for refugees since she started volunteering in 2016 at the Denver office of the International Rescue Committee. From creating summer camp opportunities for refugee children to helping families register their children for school and obtain the services and supports they need to succeed and so much more, she has demonstrated that one person can truly improve the lives of people in need.

Jessica Kovarik worked with Nancy for four years while serving as a Resettlement Manager at IRC. She said Nancy “did everything under the sun” for families and went above and beyond to help them, especially the children.

“She moves mountains and breaks down barriers to ensure clients have access to resources and opportunities they deserve,”

Kovarik said.

“If I knew a family needed extra support or assistance, I would ask her to get involved, usually starting with school enrollment and advocating for all types of assistance, including housing, food and connecting them to other resources in the community. She would take them under her wing and make a commitment to supporting them.

One of the most beautiful aspects of Nancy’s time supporting IRC clients is the reciprocal nature of their relationship. In speaking with Nancy, it’s easy to see the incredible mark and impact they have left on her life. We’d all be lucky to have a bit more Nancy in our lives!”

Nancy said she is grateful to have built close relationships with many people and that they have taught her so much and enriched her life.

“The legacy I’d like to leave is one of compassion and kindness. The families I’ve met are important to me and I try to do all that I can to improve their lives and help them see a future for themselves and their children. When I get depressed about the world and the inequities, I focus back on helping one kid go to school, one kid go to camp and one kid to have opportunities. I’m not going to change everything in the world, but I do what I can to make a difference.”

A Life of Compassion

Nancy was born and raised in Denver in a middle-class family, the younger of two daughters. She said she has always had a strong sense of compassion.

“When I was little, I would line up my stuffed animals in bed next to me because I didn’t want them to be cold and then I’d fall out of bed,”

Nancy said with a chuckle.

After graduating from high school, she earned a bachelor’s degree in sociology at American University and then worked in marketing at nonprofit organizations before going back to her alma mater to earn a master’s degree in Health Fitness Management. She got married and worked as Director of Public Relations at Hamline University in Minnesota, a job she had in 1993 when a newspaper story changed the direction of her life.

It was a chilly Spring Sunday morning when Nancy and her husband Tom sat down in their living room in Minneapolis to read the New York Times. Nancy read the front-page feature - “First Born, Fast Grown: The Manful Life of Nicholas, 10” - the first in a series called Children Of the Shadows. Written by Isabel Wilkerson, who in 1994 became the first African-American woman to win the Pulitzer Prize in journalism, the story described the hardscrabble life of a 10-year-old boy, the oldest of five children, in inner city Chicago. The article was so compelling that many people called to help the family. Nancy felt a connection with the family and called the reporter saying that, instead of sending a check, she wanted to help and make a difference.

At the time, she was serving on the Board of Camp Warren YMCA camp. Nancy thought about how she could help the boy. She worked to establish a relationship with the mother, build trust and find opportunities for the boys. Nancy and her husband flew Nicholas and Willy out to stay with them and to attend camp at least four more summers after that. The boys grew up and faced challenges in their adult lives. Nancy and her husband visited them in Chicago and stayed in touch. Their mother earned a college degree and was able to create a better life for her younger children. But for Nicholas and Willy, the childhood traumas left a long-term impact on them.

That experience led her to an 8-year position supervising a team of 50 guardian ad litem volunteers who advocated for the best interest of children who were in the child protective system in Minnesota.

Then she moved back to Denver and spent six years helping families of chronically truant children in Aurora Public Schools (APS) to keep their children in school, followed by two years implementing a new APS program that helps teen parents stay in school, earn their GEDs and pursue higher education.

For every position she had, Nancy went into homes and spent a lot of time with children and their families to build trust, understand their perspective, find ways to help and maintain long-term relationships.

Nancy learned about refugees while working in APS and seeing new families enter schools to register their children. She saw how difficult it was for them to navigate the systems and how challenging it was for the schools to support these families. After retiring, Nancy and her husband volunteered for a month at a refugee camp in Greece. She helped parents and children from Syria. She learned that the average stay in a refugee camp is 20 years before they get to a new country. They met incredibly resilient refugee families and made lifelong friends.

When they returned from Greece, Nancy became a volunteer at the new IRC office. Due to her background, she became the point person for helping families register for school and had a business card with the title “Volunteer School Coordinator” which she gave to families so they could contact her for help.

As a Board Member of the Denver YMCA, Nancy developed a new four-year partnership between the IRC and the YMCA to provide summer camp opportunities for refugee children while their parents worked. Nancy also implemented ESL, yoga, cooking and other classes. Over 200 children attended the 8-week camp on full scholarships, where they were able to go on day trips, swim, visit the zoo and do other activities.

Over the last few years, she’s focused on helping Afghan refugee families. She helps them directly with her time but also advocates directly to IRC staff and other agencies for their needs.

Jennifer Perry, Volunteer Coordinator at the Denver IRC office, described Nancy’s work and advocacy as “stellar, extraordinary and unmatched in our volunteer community.”

“She is a persistent and fierce advocate,”

Perry said.

“She is direct and persistent and doesn’t take no for an answer when she knows that there is an issue on equity. She is absolutely someone that you would want in your corner.”

 

Written by IRC Volunteer Myung Oak Kim